So I was watching  this silly show on Bravo the other day called “Things I Hate About You”.  If you haven’t seen it, it’s a show where couples go on national television to prove who is more annoying.  There’s a panel of judges and in the end, the less annoying half is branded a saint, gets a prize, and is allowed to subject their more annoying half to a silly punishment.  Ex: for the woman who thinks her husband chews too loudly.  She had to sit between two speakers and listen to him eat all sorts of noisy foods (corn nuts, chex cereal, etc) into a microphone.  It’s highly entertaining and addictive.  Anyway, the point is the other night they had the most functional couple I’ve ever seen on there.  Their habits were a bit annoying, but not psycho like most of the other couples on the show.  As the relationship expert said, their neuroses complemented each other.  They were also the first gay couple they’d had on the show.  These two men had been together for twelve years and watching them was like watching your parents (if your parents are still happily married).  They were as great an example of a good relationship as I’d seen in a long time.  And it struck me that these people are living without any sort of recognition from the state that they are a unit.  And it reminded me of the friends I have that have been together almost as long as my parents and are forced to live like roommates.  And it made me sick again and sad again and frustrated again like it always does.  Please, someone, anyone, tell me why gay people are so scary?  I want to know, really, seriously, what is it that makes your skin crawl?  Why are they your boogeyman?  Why do they threaten your marriage?  Because you think they’re hot and really want to make hot gay monkey-love to them?  What?  And I don’t want to hear no bullshit about “God says it’s wrong”.  You know what?  That’s crap.  Because for one, God does NOT make the laws for this country, no matter what you want to believe and two, the day God comes down to earth and tells me how gay people are an abomination and explains why, despite that, he continues to make more of them, then I’ll say, “oh, God said it’s wrong.”  And then I’ll double-check with Jesus, and then I’ll say, “You guys are pretty sadistic, what happened to this forgiveness thing?”  And then I’ll go join the Scientologists or the Wiccans or something.  But until that day happens, which I’m not going to hold my breath for, I’ll continue to believe that gay people should have every right and protection I have and that our loves are equal.

And what pisses me off the most is that I think we are merely a generation  away from getting to the point where everyone feels the way I do, at least in some degree.  Where everyone knows gay people and sees how un-threatening they are and thinks they deserve basic human rights.  But the assholes of our grandparents’ and parents’ generation who are ruining the country right now, are trying to pass through changes to our FUCKING CONSTITUTION so that things are changed forever.  Hey, while you’re at it, could you please leave the Bill of Rights on your way out?  Obviously, we’ve decided it’s not useful anymore, but I’d like to keep it to show to my grandchildren some day. 

If you can’t give everyone the rights and protections of marriage, take it away from all of us.  Either have the state give domestic partner certificates and the church do the marriage part, or just don’t let any of us form official monogomous unions.  Liberty and Justice for All.